Where Are My Pants?

Whoa, hold up, let's chill for a second. Ok, where are my pants?

Parenting Philosophy Corner: It's not OK for regular people to leave the house and walk around in public while not wearing pants. So why would it be okay for a baby to do so?

Are you saying that a person can go around not wearing pants simply because he wears small, cute pants. I mean, we make little people wear pants--you would call the police, or at least head the other direction, if you saw a horde of pantless midgets running around, right? That's what I thought.

And don't give me the line about "Oh, he's wearing a diaper, so it's fine." That is such B.S. Would you let your incontinent grandmother out of the house wearing only a diaper? If you would, then I hope someone calls the senior abuse hotline over your sadistic behavior.

Unless you want your child to be a stripper, the Naked Cowboy, or a Brindsay Kardilton-style starlet, pants are not optional.